Meet the Elites

National Network News correspondent Anna Level interviews top athletes following the Palindrome 10K.

NNN: Hello! What is your name?
Hannah
NNN: And your last name?
Renner

NNN: I notice you’re wearing shoes by Nike, Hannah. Did you get a sponsorship from them?
HR: Did I? I did.

NNN: You appear to be very fit. How much do you weigh?
HR: 101

NNN: Skinny-Minny. What person most inspires you?
HR: Mom

NNN: That’s sweet. Who is your coach?
HR: Levin Snivel

NNN: How do you and your coach see things?
HR: Eye 2 eye.

NNN: Who could ask for anything more. I noticed that one of your competitors stumbled. What happened?
HR: Dee saw a seed.

NNN: Oh. You’re very focused when you run. What were you thinking as you approached the finish line?
HR: Nail Lillian

NNN: And nail her you did. What was your average pace?
HR: 5:05

NNN: Not bad. How did your teammates do?
HR: Nina Ricci ran in.

NNN: Good for her! What is your favorite post-race food?
HR: I prefer pi.

NNN: I make a mean Lemon Meringue my own self. What advice do you have for other runners?
HR: Live not on evil.

NNN: Well said. May I take your picture?
HR: Oh, cameras are macho.

NNN: Very well. Thank you for taking the time to talk with us, Hannah. Let’s move on now to this young man. What is your name, sir?
Madam, I’m Adam.

NNN: How old are you, Adam?
A: 22

NNN: I saw you say something to the runner who was drafting behind you. What was it?
A: Evade me, Dave.

NNN: That’s telling him. What were you hoping to achieve in this race?
A: Top spot.

NNN: Hmmm. Tell us how you feel about placing second?
A: Dammit I’m mad.

NNN: Yes, I can see that. What was your finish time?
A: 30:03

NNN: Your team mate failed to finish. To what do you attribute this?
A: Poor Dan is in a droop.

NNN: Let’s hope he snaps out of it soon. You yourself seem awfully quiet. What’s wrong?
A: Too hot to hoot.

NNN: Who is your coach?
A: Sydney Yendys

NNN: I’ve heard of him. Well-respected. What do you do to cross-train?
A: Kayak

NNN: And how did you carbo-load before the race?
A: Stressed I desserts.

NNN: Prefer I chocolate my own self. Do you have any advice for other runners?
A: Step on no pets.

NNN: Words to live by. May I offer you a Cohiba to celebrate your finish?
A: Cigar? Toss it in a can. It is so tragic.

NNN: Not as tragic as this interview. Thank you for your time, Hannah and Adam. And congratulations on your race.

This is Anna Level at the Palindrome 10K for National Network News.